Dude, Chillax. There is a Message.

I really thought that I would lick sand to get rid of the Michael Jackson "FRONT PAGE NEWS!" Alas, I was wrong, bring back The Scarecrow if I have to read another "Sarah Palin done shot herself in the stomach" post.

Look, everyone that has spoken up regarding Sarah's resignation is WRONG so far. Here, lemme drop it on you. If you actually believe that Palin is YOUR SAVIOR, then you are in essence the same as a brain-dead Obamabot. AND, BIG FRIGGIN' AND, the Congress is the entity that is passing idiotic legislation that is taking away all of your money, wealth and your kid's future. The President CANNOT do any spending UNLESS Congress sends it to the White House.

By the way, I lurved me some Ronald Reagan, but even HE was not my master.

Get a grip, folks, our philosophy is one of limited government and that STARTS at home, and moves toward Washington DC, NOT the other way around. So, having a titular head of the movement is ASS-BACKWARDS. Just so you know, I am the titular head of my OWN FRIGGIN' MOVEMENT. Hey! You! Do the same!

For the supposedly smart folks to talk about STATES RIGHTS and then completely contradict that by thinking on a national scale is really ridiculous. Think about that for a minute.

And now, think about the fact that Sarah Palin is only forty-five years old and if she runs for President at forty-nine, she has effectively removed her voice for the rest of her natural life in the grand scheme of things.

Now, reflect on Barry Obama for a minute. He ran for President in his late forties and now that he has won, he is completely irrelevant, just like Jimmy Carter. We shall get to watch him (for quite possibly the next thirty years) being a washed-up, old, bitter moron backed by an entire tenure of FAIL. Yes, he is an utter failure as President, in case you did not know already.

Do you want that for Sarah Palin, who is quite possibly the most charismatic politician since Ronald Reagan? Did it ever occur to anyone that maybe Sarah Palin wants to really make a difference in the philosophical direction of this country by working to get the right people prepared for the future?

And yes, that could include just sitting at home and taking care of the most important people in her OWN DAMN LIFE.

Please take the time to comment.

It is Independence Day, Folks!

Really, it is TWO DAYS AFTER Independence Day, but I understand that the fourth of July is now recognized as the day. Of the over 200 posts that I read this morning regarding the holiday, about ninety percent said, "Happy Fourth of July."

That statement does not bother me so much, but it does belittle the GRAVITY of what we are supposed to be celebrating. We are recognizing that some fifty-six guys placed their names on a document that refuted the authority of what was then, the most powerful militarily advanced country on the face of the planet. They risked their very lives and their families lives to give to us the greatest country in the HISTORY OF THE WORLD.

And, please understand that the Declaration was not actually completely signed until August of 1776. Read the Wiki, yeah, it is NOT all correct, but they are really stupid over there.

Salute your flag and the determination of your country, folks. (Hat-Tip: Classical Liberal)

And always remember that liberty, freedom, and independence are NOT FREE. (Hat-Tip: Steve Rankin)

Please take the time to comment.

YES! DANG! IT! TO! HELL!

Yes, it IS my real name.

FEAR. THE. MULLET.

Please take the time to comment.

Archiving the HuffPo Turdfest Fucktards (UPDATED!!)

Since today has been so utterly awesome for me, I decided to go hang out at Twittah for a minute. Shocking revelations that I found in the first few seconds.

Yes, the morons are trolling Top Conservatives on Twitter as usual, but with a new twist.

Already HuffPo has yet another moronic article up, but this one is dealing with why Sarah Palin is resigning, allegedly. Click the image and read what they had on the site. Leftists have such good senses of humor.

The fact that people like this exist tells me that there is a reason to be armed. They are obviously FUCKING INSANE and DANGEROUS.

Arianna Huffington, you are a piece of shit and you shall BURN IN HELL.

UPDATE: The DUMBASS that posted this lunacy has apologized for "hurting feelings." I did not feel any "hurt" at all, I thought that it was the typical leftist stupidity, not unlike the ridiculousness that comes from their camp daily. I felt pity that there exists people that are that fucking stupid. "Hurt?" None whatsoever.

Please take the time to comment.

Pre-Independence Day News

Today has been an utter shitstorm of awesome here at La Casa Mitchell and I get back to the Cray 26,000 to find out that the news that I had to pass along kinda pales in comparison to Sarah Palin saying that she is going to resign as governor of Alaska at the end of July.

WTF, peoples? I guess that news of my new freezer fan is NOT the whopper that I had built up in my mind, huh? I bet y'all don't even want to hear about that NOW.

Here's a rundown of the rundown on Sarah Palin's resignation. Funny how she did the Runners World spread and then all of the sudden she dumps the head office of Alaska, huh? I bet she is going PRO on the marathon circuit. (Just so you know, her legs are so hot that it would take the frigging SWAT Team and the Jaws of Life to get me off of her. IF. THEY. COULD.)

The other thing that it seems would be a good fit for Sarah would be to team up with FOX News and do an opinion show. Oddly enough FOX doesn't really have any legitimate competition in the news broadcasting realm. You know, since they have TEN of the TOP TEN and THIRTEEN of the TOP FIFTEEN News programs. Maybe with Palin on board, they would be able to curb the news market entirely.

Here's a really odd occurrence, one of the five people that watches Keith Olbermann's show can actually read, write, and make an attempt at correspondence in English. Of course, THEY ARE FRIGGIN' DUMB AS SCABS AND FINGERNAILS. Even Dan Patrick coughed up his skull laughing at that letter.

Maybe Palin has resigned to go into the child care industry to help out people that should never have spawned. People using the word "gender" when they mean "sex" makes me want to kill bunnies, kittens, and baby pandas.

Maybe Sarah is going to open a school that teaches etiquette and patriotism. It seems that the Democrats do have a little bit of a problem with the Pledge of Allegiance. Of course, they HAVE always been the party of hate.

Maybe she saw the opening as Governor Mark Sanford has an utter vaginal meltdown moment and just wants to NOT be associated with anyone of his ILK. Good Lord, boy, you want me to get your shawl and PURSE outta the truck? SOULMATE?!?!?!?!

As long as we are discussing MARRIAGE, one of my Facebook buddies, Drew Olanoff, proposed to his girl over Twittah! Dude, that is just awesome on so many levels that if this week hadn't have been so crazy, his proposal would have been the story of the week. By the way, she said YES! Good luck, you crazy kids.

There are so many good stories in the news this week that I cannot comment on all of them. Below is a genuine LINKDUMP. Enjoy.

Michael Jackson stuff. With DOPE.

Reverse Vampyr apologizes for being a deadbeat blogger. Worry the shit out of him, please.

Sonia Sotomayor gets overturned, UNANIMOUSLY. Not 5-4, sorry Libtards.

Jobs news. NOT GOOD. Obamanomics rivals Jimmynomics in its asininity.

Steve B gets some links. I shall try to piggyback on his success, because I am a VULTURE.

Guess who is financing the media push for ObamaFAILcare? ACORN, SEIU, and Soros.

My good buddy, Pam Meister was all over the webbytubes this week. At Family Security Matters. At Pajamas Media, and SHITFIRE, I lost the other links. I swear I suck, but not literally.

Remember folks, tomorrow is July the fourth, but the occasion is Independence Day. Celebrate your freedom, the new, moron powers that be are coming for it. Buy a firearm in celebration.

Please take the time to comment.

I Believe I Shall Dissent

A SHOCKING development occurred today while I was out making the donuts. Supposedly, the Right-o-sphere is chomping at the bit that Helen Thomas (of the Old Trolls Weekly) and Chip Reid (of Nancy Boy Hairstyles) gave Robert Gibbs a bunch of flak at a presser today.

Folks, this is NOT a sign that these Libtards are about to start doing their job, this is a gentle way to let everyone know that the questions to be asked on this week's episode of "Friends" are going to be extraordinarily soft. Good Lord, we are talking about HELEN FRIGGING THOMAS!

Watch and see if you can decide which one of the LOTR trilogy movies Helen starred in. Extra points for naming her character's name, too!



The only shocking thing in this video is that Robert Gibbs did not projectile shit his pants when the scratchy voice of the oldest living creature known to man finally awoke and wretched the hideous sounds from the bowels of her cakehole.

I cannot wait for her to sing "Happy Birthday" to Barry this August.

By the way, at this lickfest we were discussing in the presser, President Water-Wing Ears hugged a woman stricken with cancer and the Barrystream Media SHAT a golden cow when she was miraculously HEALED!!!

Please take the time to comment.

WTW - Independence Day!

With the coming holiday, I thought that it would be a good idea to show some flag etiquette, because we take that stuff seriously down here in the South.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, NO!

I am trying to figure out exactly which one of the rules of flag etiquette that John McCain has violated with this Speedo. Good taste is NOT one of the few rules.

I think that I shall go with this one: The flag should never be used as a receptacle for receiving, holding, carrying, or delivering anything.

Read them and you decide.

Just so you know (and for palette cleanser) this is WRONG, too.

Please take the time to comment.

Etiquette and Good Manners

Last week I received a comment that appeared to be a nice one with a request to read the post another blogger wrote about me. I went to the commentator's blog and to my surprise it was nothing nice at all. I basically got called a ignorant hick.

I am okay with that and get it quite a bit. That is fine, no blood, no foul.

However, my blog post was used in a classroom setting at Georgia Tech. For exactly what purpose, I am unsure, but I would assume since most college professors adhere closely to the intellectually incurious ideology, I assume that it could not be good.

Anyhoo, I took much time writing an interblarg note to my new found troll offering some much needed tips since he was new to the webbyblargs. And oddly enough, I was nice about it, too. I have received NO RESPONSE. Even though I know that he has read my e-mail and actually used one of my tips.

By the way, all of y'all that tried to help our little friends basically got called STEAMY TURDS for helping him to understand his wrongness.

Here's the e-mail that I sent the young lad, tell me if it sounds harsh.

CT,

I do hope this e-mail finds you doing well. As a newcomer to blogging, trial by fire is a good way to start. As you apparently found out quickly, regular readers (to any blog) do take it personally when you attack their ideology. However, I do want to offer some unsolicited advice. Be prepared to back up your ideology or opinion in any debate. Those of us that have been blogging for any amount of time can find resources at the drop of a hat. And also, blogs are the ONLY source that is legitimate these days. In case you were unaware, ABC just ran an infomercial on their network (during prime time!) for our president regarding healthcare. They accepted NO OPPOSING VIEW. Did they perform their duties REQUIRED by acceptance of their RIGHTS guaranteed by the First Amendment? Hardly.

One of the best sources for world and country news today would be Gateway Pundit. Check it out, you will get your news and information unfiltered through the typical media bias.

On a regular basis, I engage liberals on Twitter in a battle of 140 characters and I am always amazed at the amount of support the left must have to debate. A standard debate with any leftist that I engage is usually a minimum of eight on one. And yes, intelligence and knowledge trumps feelings and hunches every time. That is the nature of political debate, but I do not REQUIRE a posse. Be informed and also KNOW that HuffPo is NOT a reference. It is the very same as using MSNBC to bolster your point. Howard Zinn is also forbotten. I think that it would be really hard to reach the ripe old age of eighteen without knowing that the journalism profession is overrun with the typical misinformed liberal ideology.

Also, NEVER bring Nazis into the debate if you are debating the Democrat/Liberal side. Nazis are the epitome of Liberal. I think that we covered that ground pretty well, though.

Just for your information because you did have the guts (or insanity) to jump into the mix without doing any research on me at all. I have not listened to Limbaugh since 1991. I do not watch television at all either, unless it is a baseball game that I really want to see. You see, my opinions are mine and I voice them loudly. If you check my sidebar, you shall find all sorts of information about my opinions on different topics. Check under 'Search Me' for the labels. Those opinions were developed over years of voracious reading and I read everything. My opinions regarding our current president were established well before most people had even heard of Barry Obama. My first post on him was in October of 2005. I read both of HIS books, too. How many people that voted for him do you think actually read the racist tripe called "Dreams from my Father?"

I also read over 200 blogs and news sites daily. I am self-employed and operate at all hours of the day and night.

I do apologize for letting the comment section get somewhat out of hand yesterday and you experiencing the piling on, I was not in my office most of the day and was posting from my phone, which I am wont to do when receiving numerous comments. iTAP blows. My comment policy is also placed on the sidebar as well under "About Me and the Blog." I hope you did not get roughed up too badly to return. All opinions are welcomed, but do remember that it is MY BLOG.

I shall say this in the defense of my ideology for no particular reason. Conservatism is NOT about passing legislation to promote a conservative agenda. It is quite simply limited government. To give you a very good perspective of where I stand, we can look at gay folks marrying. The fact that government is involved in any marriage AT ALL is WRONG. The only reason that it is used as a government sanction, vehicle, whatever, is to TAX IT. If two adult dudes want to hug up on each other, that is their DAMNED BUSINESS. Yes, there are some folks on the conservative side that want to legislate certain things, however they are wrong in their opinions. To outlaw abortion is stupid, it is wrong and should have a social stigma so firmly placed around it that no one would ever do it. Do we need a law? Not in any way.

Also think about this basic terminology. If the "left" is for total government control, what would the "right" want? Zero government control. Right and left are supposed opposites, correct? Yet oddly, the anarchists are also marching alongside the communists in Democrat ideology. Can you explain that? No, because it makes no sense. Ideology and philosophy are key in this life. Develop yours and make it your own.

Now, the inline comments on your blog prohibit me from commenting. Firefox and my firewall do not allow me to enter my user name to post. There is a setting on the Blogger Dashboard Settings/Comments tab that chooses the Comment Form Placement. "Pop-up window" works best for all browsers and it doesn't require the person to leave your main page to comment. Leakage of folks from the front page is BAD for traffic.

Anyhoo, thanks for commenting and thank your teacher for putting my blog up, no matter how badly I got trashed. Maybe there shall be a couple of GaTech students that will see that conservatives harbor ZERO hatred, they just want the government to protect our country and let us make money, like we always have.

Did I lose my shit? Nope. Did he respond? Nope.

As the imaginary mother of my many children would say, "RUDE."

Please take the time to comment.

Feng Shui FAIL

Since it is very easy for me to make fun of my chosen profession because the industry is OVER-populated with MORONS, I thought that it would be fun to show you THIS.

At one time in the not so distant past, architects were known as MASTER BUILDERS. That is completely forgotten now with the profession plagued with an influx of "artists" that do not understand even the most basic of building practices. Corners are shaved with regularity to maintain an artificial aesthetic in the name of ART.

To further compound the problems endemic to intellectually incurious artists that have rushed into the profession, there exists an even more crippling deficiency of corruption by an ever more intrusive government bureaucracy. Whether by design or by fecklessness, the government and its henchmen have made life safety issues into the most confusing and contradictory morass of asininity. China proves that point well.

As MASTER BUILDERS, architects should be more concerned with the issue of safety rather than the art of building design. "First, do not harm" comes to mind from the jump. Our primary concern in all cases should be to make certain that our buildings DO NOT KILL people.

Pushing the envelope of mathematics and science, while jeopardizing human life is kinda stupid. And fatal. Know your architect and his/her grasp of construction safety and dependibility or DIE.

By the way, only one workman was killed in this "accident." Wonder how many people would have died if this thirteen story (eeeek!) building would have survived the construction phase?

Clarification: The title of this post makes a reference to Feng Shui. This building was in China? Get it? By the way, architecture done properly does not require further consultants. Just saying.

Please take the time to comment.

A Legislating Conundrum

There continues to be talk about "immigration reform." Can someone please explain to me what the problem IS exactly?

Sorry, but I guess that I just not FUCKING STUPID enough to find the problem here. In order for FARNERS to go to any country in the frigging world, they must have proper LEGAL documentation. If someone goes to a country without that documentation and they get caught doing it, THEY GO TO JAIL AND GET DEPORTED. Or if they happen to get caught doing that in a Muslim country, they get beheaded and burned, then drug through the city streets behind camels and shit.

In the United States, we have laws on the books NOW that say pretty much the same thing. The United States is a representative republic that is a NATION OF LAWS. If our elected representatives passed and signed LAWS that say it is illegal for folks to just come here without documentation, why do we NOT simply ENFORCE THOSE LAWS? (Insert reference to enforcing murder/rape/theft laws here.)

Now when I tell my kid that this is the way a certain thing is, I must follow through, otherwise he will get the idea that my word means nothing. So, when our elected officials pass laws that they do not enforce, what does that tell CRIMINALS? Or what does it tell their constituents? It tells both that the official's words are worth NOTHING. As if we did not know that already.

Here it is in a nutshell, if you want to solve the immigration problem in this country, get the law dogs to round the folks up that are here illegally and ship them home. I am certain that with airline prices in the toilet right now, that would be cheaper than providing a living for all these folks on the public dole, ILLEGALLY.

There is your solution, my invoice is in the mail. STIMULUS!

Please take the time to comment.

Wire-to-Wire Billy Mays Coverage

Since June 2009 shall forever be known as "The Month of the Falling Giants," we are going to cover the loss of quite possibly the GREATEST GIANT of them all, Billy Mays. Seriously, I have no clue who the Hell he is, but if his passing gets Michael Jackson off the lead story, Billy Mays has done us a great turn. My heart goes out to the Mays family. The loss of a loved one is never an easy thing and y'all are in my prayers.

The list of stories that you might have missed since the passing of the Jackson Freak is very long indeed. Let's catch some of them, mmmkay?

Michelle Obama is a RAGING ALCOHOLIC. Wow, I would have never guessed that in a million years. You know, alcoholism and being married to a homosexual cokehead just does NOT equate. Maybe Arms Obamoron needs one of THESE to sit through TelePrompTer Jesus' next READING ENGAGEMENT. Or maybe her husband's Blaxploitation book, Dreams from my Father, being written by a terrorist upset her enough to start BOOZING it up.

While our country is being run by drunken idiots, Iranian officials are quietly arresting British diplomats. Wow! You would think that would be exploding all over the headlines, huh? My memory keeps trying to tell me that the Iranians did something like that in the past when the precursor to the current IMBECILE was in the White House, but I just cannot recall the details.

Somewhere in Central America, a democracy is falling. This represents the first to fall during the Obama RAPE of the world. Folks, when Obama picked Hillary Clinton as SecState, you knew that it would be BAD. (Hat-Tip: Dan Collins)

Also, the polar bears are overpopulating the WORLD. Holy shit! Can something please be done? Oh, you are going to pass MORE legislation to protect them? Great idea and welcome to Contrarianland where we HATE, HATE, HATE science.

Sonia Sotomayor is a RACIST!!! I actually thought that the leftists believed that every white person was a racist. I guess the political correctness depends on where your parents were born. Since Tay-rah-za Heinz Kerry was born in Africa, I guess that makes her the epitome of anti-racist, huh?

You know what California did to cause the bankruptcy of the state? Yeah, they do NOT have high enough taxes.

Christiane Amanpour says that no one knows her positions on anything. She actually believes that her biases do not show through in her "reporting." And in related news, the SUN is very, very COLD.

Wonder why Broadway WANTS to go broke? Well, it is because most people in the entertainment industry are morons that do not understand economics and business. That photo just pisses me off no end. Didn't the FASCIST Reagans KNOW that the drunken, drugged out Obamas are the only first family to lurve each other?

Folks, there is something seriously wrong in this country right now. Dang, I wish that I could only put my finger on it. OH RIGHT!

Please take the time to comment.